1/29/07
The sun, white gold
in his descent, touches
the trees, making
beautiful warmth—
but leaves a cold shadow
behind them both.
He runs his beams
through her hair, illuminating
it, making it golden,—
she glows—
but she hides her face
from the sun’s sharp sting.
She has seen what he does
to the trees, so beautiful,
and following—it’s so cold
and dark.
She knows the danger
he brings—and yet what
fun he gives—until
he sets.
So what does she do?
How does she handle this
beautiful danger? Will she
let him warm her, maker her
glow as the trees do?
They are admirable, the trees,
they accept both sides to the sun—
they have no choice.
But she does.
it's old, but i figured i'd post it because we haven't been doing anything lately . . . i'll accept whatever kind of criticism you want to give me. I'd like to improve as a writer . . . :)
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Monday, November 5, 2007
Dear fellow-writers,
It occurred to me that posting and commenting can make us all feel quite vulnerable. So I thought we might implement the 'coding' of entries used by the National Writing Project. When a writer comments on something, s/he can either 'bless,' 'address,' or 'press'. 'Bless' means praise the writer (for the very nervous); 'address' means 'write a friendly critique, making suggestions on what could be changed, as well as compliments'; 'press' means 'put pressure on the writer; really challenge them to rethink and revise.' Each writer gets to choose what kind of comments they would like. What do you think?
It occurred to me that posting and commenting can make us all feel quite vulnerable. So I thought we might implement the 'coding' of entries used by the National Writing Project. When a writer comments on something, s/he can either 'bless,' 'address,' or 'press'. 'Bless' means praise the writer (for the very nervous); 'address' means 'write a friendly critique, making suggestions on what could be changed, as well as compliments'; 'press' means 'put pressure on the writer; really challenge them to rethink and revise.' Each writer gets to choose what kind of comments they would like. What do you think?
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Nothing Right
Why is that everything I do is wrong?
What did I do to deserve this?
What in the hell did I do?
Just delivering a message
Just trying my best
Just doing what I'm suppose to do
All Wrong
Nothing Right
The thought of it all
hurts me
Can't think straight
Nothing to release my anger on
Nowhere to just get away
Nowhere to just SCREAM
Need Help
Don't know where to go
What did I do to deserve this?
What in the hell did I do?
Just delivering a message
Just trying my best
Just doing what I'm suppose to do
All Wrong
Nothing Right
The thought of it all
hurts me
Can't think straight
Nothing to release my anger on
Nowhere to just get away
Nowhere to just SCREAM
Need Help
Don't know where to go
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Move On
Breathe
Relax
Control Anger
Stop Crying
There's nothing to cry about
Stop IT!
Your such a baby
Breathe
Dry your tears
You've got work to do
Relax
Control Anger
Stop Crying
There's nothing to cry about
Stop IT!
Your such a baby
Breathe
Dry your tears
You've got work to do
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